Why I can do both and BE both

My blog content up until now has been quite easy breezy, a few fashion posts, a few holiday snaps and a few days out recommendations but I thought I would do something a little bit more personal today and give an insight into what some would call my "day job". 
I am a designer, and no not a fashion designer as might be most people's first guess, but a set designer. I design sets for stage and theatre, which is where my real passion has been ever since I was a little girl. I won't lie, there is absolutely nothing glamorous about it, I build things, spend most of my life in a pair of paint covered old jeans, and some days can't even unlock my phone from the amount of superglue that has encrusted my fingertips, but I love it. It is something that you can get so lost in and there is honestly nothing like seeing one of your designs standing on a stage after spending months working on it, building it, painting it and watching it all come together. 
But here is my issue. With it being so polar opposite to, what I tend to call my 'hobby'- fashion and blogging - I am finding myself almost being embarrassed of the other and trying to justify them both depending on who I am with. Why though? Why can't I do both of these things and be both of these people without conforming to the stereotype of the role? I find myself constantly trying to play down this feminine side of me to be taken more seriously as a designer, to the point where before I have a meeting with a new director or producer I put on my "designer's uniform" of my timberland boots, a flannel shirt and my trusty painting jeans. I didn't even realise I was doing it until recently I rediscovered the famous speech by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie and it all clicked:

"I wanted to be taken seriously. I knew that because I was female, I would automatically have to prove my worth. And I was worried that if I looked too feminine, I would not be taken seriously. I really wanted to wear my shiny lip gloss and my girly skirt, but I decided not to I wore a very serious, very manly, and very ugly suit. The sad truth of the matter is that when it comes to appearance, we start off with men as the standard, as the norm. Many of us think that the less feminine a woman appears, the more likely she is to be taken seriously. A man going to a business meeting doesn't wonder about being taken seriously based on what he is wearing- but a woman does."

Now I know that obviously in my industry I am not saying that it would be practical at all to wear any clothes I wanted, and I probably will continue to wear my paint covered jeans until they fall apart because AINT NOBODY got time for a wardrobe full of ruined clothes, but it just got me thinking about my outlook on things; getting embarrassed when anyone at uni brings up my blogging or Instagram and putting all my profiles on private at the start of a new project incase anyone has a little search. It all came to a head really that I casually mentioned to my mum that I was thinking of dying my hair back to brown after I graduated so that I would be taken more seriously, and I kid you not she looked at me as if I had just told her I was dropping out of uni entirely. Her clever mummy words of wisdom were, "if someone is going to hire you, they are going to hire you based on your talent and your work not on what your bloody hair looks like, don't be ridiculous". And she was right, as long as I keep a maintain a level of professionalism to both my work and blogging, why should my hair colour or my hobby have any impact on whether I get jobs or not?

So for now both the blonde hair and the blog are here to stay, but if any of you want to keep up with my set design work, I will pop my other Instagram down below.

If just one person has made it to the end of this post I want to say a massive thank you for taking the time to read my mind ramblings, it really means a lot.

T x

@tarausherdesign

AND

@tarajadeusher

Taking Boux to Corfu

So after a crazy few weeks I FINALLY have a moment to breathe, catch up on my blog posts and  update you on a couple of snippets from my summer (and gives me a chance to reminisce as I begrudgingly bring the winter coats back out for the next 9 months or so). As you may or may not have seen from my Instagram - which I'm sure you probably have because I completely overdid the sunset boomerangs - I recently got back from a week in Corfu and it was beautiful.

We stayed at the Mayor La Grotta Verde resort and after a stressful 10 hour journey, thunderstorms, flooding, a quick stop off in Athens and then an hour wait for a coach, we finally made it to the hotel and honestly, seeing the view from our balcony made it all worth it. Despite the slightly chaotic start, we had such a lovely relaxing holiday, spent a week just forgetting about work, soaking up the sunshine and eating and drinking our way through the all inclusive.

Now of course some of my Boux pieces came with me, as I was lucky enough to receive my September box a few days before we left, and was able to take some snaps of it in a slightly more interesting location than my bedroom. The 'Tanya Satin Teddy' I am wearing is in the colour Claret and was perfect for something a bit more special for holiday, but I can't help feeling that is a season-round colour and - as much as I hate to admit it - my mind is already wandering towards Christmas and how perfect this would be for a Christmas gift/ treat (one to add to the wishlist ladies or idea bank gents).

The second set from my September box was this gorgeous "Lexie Triangle Bra" set with matching thong, which admittedly didn't actually make it down to the beach with me, yes I am aware that it is lingerie and not swimwear, yes mum. But I thought that this insane embroidery detail was too pretty to not get a photo with a nice backdrop and I am super excited about layering this up for autumn under some nice crisp shirts with the cross chest detail just about peeking out to add a sexy little touch to it. 

The one item from this month's box that I didn't get a photo of was my "Nia hooded twosie", which I did actually wear to and from the airport but with all the excitement we had on our journey, it didn't seem the right time to stress my poor boyfriend out asking for airport outfit pics, but I can confirm that through storms, a very squashed and uncomfortable 6 hour flight, and 1 hour waiting for coaches to turn up at 5am, it gets 10/10 for comfort and warmth, would recommend.  No but in all seriousness, Boux Avenue have some gorgeous loungewear in just in time for winter, so if you plan on hibernating until the sunshine comes back out again like me, go and have a look and get yourself snug.

Will link all items below and don't forget that you can get 20% off online when entering "TARAJADE20" at the checkout if you want to pick anything up!

Tara-Jade x

Tanya Satin Teddy: http://www.bouxavenue.com/teddies-and-bodies/tanya-satin-teddy/201843.html?cgid=1000484&dwvar_201843_dressSize=06&dwvar_201843_color=40CL#start=5

Lexie Triangle Bra: http://www.bouxavenue.com/bras/strappy-lexie-triangle-bra/101702.html?dwvar_101702_dressSize=08&dwvar_101702_color=30GP&cgid=#q=lexie&lang=default&start=2

Lexie Thong: http://www.bouxavenue.com/new-in/strappy-lexie-thong/101703.html?dwvar_101703_color=30GP&dwvar_101703_dressSize=06&cgid=#q=lexie&lang=default&start=1

Nia Hooded Twosie: http://www.bouxavenue.com/loungewear/nia-hooded-twosie/202001.html?cgid=1000500&dwvar_202001_dressSize=06&dwvar_202001_color=01EX#start=12

How I have been wearing the wrong bra size for TWO YEARS

 As promised in my last blog post, I am going to treat you to storytime about how it turns out that I have been wearing the wrong bra size for almost two years and how my first fitting at Boux Avenue as one of the new Boux Ambassadors, helped me find this out.

So. It has always been a running joke in the family that I am the only one who didn't get the boob gene, as my mum and sister have been blessed with these incredible size J and G boobies, while I have been sitting on a B since I was about 18 (OR SO I THOUGHT). 

It wasn't always like that however, at the start of my teenage life things were going so well, I got into my first big grown up relationship when I was about 14 (ha), and because my mum is the ultimate 'cool mum' got me on the pill straight away, which along with being a typical teenager and being comfortable in a young relationship, saw me put on a bit of weight but I was pushing a D cup so was pretty chuffed, along with hoisting them up to my chin with one of those ridiculous ultimate plunge bras from Primark that we all had.

My boobie life was short lived though and when I reached 17, went through a break up and a bit of a stressful and shit year, my puppy fat seemed to fall off me. Admittedly I was smitten with my new size 8 frame to begin with but what I hadn't realised was that this now meant my curves had slightly deflated and I was left with absolutely no bras that fitted me. Since then I have kind of been making it up as I go along, choosing bras that look like they might fit and just going up or down a size depending on how it goes. For the last two years I have been wearing a 32B, as although I was once told I was a 32C, I felt like they gaped a bit and I liked the bit of extra uplift that wearing a 32B gave me. 

After my fitting at Boux, it turns out the reason that I had that gaping was because my band size was too big not the cup size, and by going down a band size but going up `TWO cups sizes this fixes the problem all together! Now when I went home and told my mum and sister that I was now a 30D they both laughed and told me that I had got it wrong, but when I actually got out the new bra that I got, they both understood, although it sounds huge compared to what I thought I was, the actual size of the bra looks about the same to the eye, or as my mum put it, "wouldn't even fit a dolly" but it fits me!

Now for the bit you have probably actually come here for, the gorgeous new set.

During my fitting, I was lucky enough to be able to choose one to take home with me, and although I tried on a million different ones and wanted to take them all home, I decided on this beautiful Zoe Non-padded Triangle Bra and matching thong. What I loved about it was how intricate and sexy it was and gave me a natural uplift without any need for padding. I also like that because the colour is something a bit unique I could get away with wearing this underneath a sheer summery top with it looking like a bralet rather than a full on bra, and I am holding on to the last little bit of summer with everything I have!

The set comes with either matching high waisted sheer knickers or a thong, I went for the thong just because it will fit nicer underneath a lot of my clothes but for you girls who are a bit self conscious and want a bit more cover for any wobbly bits, the high waisted was equally gorgeous and a bit more lingerie-esque. 

If you've got this far hope you enjoyed boobie storytime and thanks for baring with me while I still get the hang of blogging, being myself and opening up a little bit.

'Til next time,

Tara-Jade x 

Zoe Non-padded Bra: http://www.bouxavenue.com/bras/zoe-non-padded-triangle-bra/101679_80EM30B.html

Zoe Mesh Thong: http://www.bouxavenue.com/knickers/zoe-mesh-thong/101680.html?dwvar_101680_dressSize=06&dwvar_101680_color=80EM&cgid=

Zoe High Waist Brief: http://www.bouxavenue.com/knickers/zoe-mesh-high-waisted-briefs/101681.html?dwvar_101681_color=80EM&dwvar_101681_dressSize=06&cgid=

Becoming a Boux Ambassador & my first Boux store visit and fitting

So, a quick heads up, for the next 9 months my feed is about to be inundated with photos of pretty lacey underwear and many a bed top flat lay. That is because I am very excited to say that I am one of this year's student Boux Ambassadors! I feel incredibly lucky to have been offered such a fun and exciting opportunity, especially representing the Oxford Street store, and want to throw myself straight into it, so fair warning and all that! 

The lovely ladies over at Boux sent out this gorgeous welcome box with the Lucie bra and matching knickers in the colour Strawberry, and a candle and body mist in their signature scent 'White chiffon', all packaged up in one of their beautifully presented gift boxes. This set was perfect for my first one, as they are sized according to clothes sizes instead of bra sizes, and I was a bit unsure of what bra size I would be in Boux as I always have trouble finding what size I am in different stores without trying them on. The colour was gorgeous, and as you may have been able to tell from my brightly coloured Instagram feed, I love a pop of colour especially in the summer. As a small boobie girl, I am joining the movement and embracing my lack of, making the most of the comfort of the delicate unpadded triangle bras while its still fashionable to have somewhat smaller assets, so this style was perfect.

As for sizings I got the top in an 8 and the knickers in a 10, just because although I am also lacking in the bum departments (sucks to be me!) I like to wear my knickers a bit bigger so that they don't cut into my hips and give awkward shapes in tight clothes, just my preference!

Both the candle and the spray were this lovely fresh clean scent, which admittedly once I let my mum have a whiff of, have now mysteriously made their way down into the living room as one of mums favourite smells in the world is jasmine. Years of stealing her perfume  and now the tables have turned!

My first Boux store visit and official fitting

I was a little nervous about heading along to my first fitting at Boux, mainly because I think I knew that I was wearing the wrong size all along, but I was scared that I was going to be told I was even smaller than I thought, BUT I think I am going to leave that story for another blog post, as this one is turning into a long one already and I want to show you what I bought as well! 

As I am still at home for summer, my nearest store was the Bluewater one, and although I am buzzing to go and see the Oxford Street store, that will have to wait until I am back up at uni, so I popped along to the Bluewater store for my first fitting. 

The girls in the store were so amazing, and made me and my sister feel so special and welcome, by greeting us with glasses of bubbly, getting me all sized up and making sure I am comfortable whilst still getting the right fit, waiting outside the changing rooms whilst I tried almost every single bra in the shop on, giving me a tour of the different collections in the store, giving recommendations on bra styles for my shape and size and grabbing anything else I needed in other sizes or styles whilst in the changing rooms at the touch of a button. I honestly cannot rate the customer service at Boux Avenue enough, and that was one of the things that I wrote on my ambassador application, every time you visit a Boux store they take the time to make you feel special and give you one on one service, which is something that you just do not get on many high street stores anymore, it is really really lovely.

I was lucky enough to be able to take home my favourite set from the day and I can't wait to show you in my next blog post so keep your eyes peeled for that one if you haven't spotted it on my Instastory already, it's a beauty!

Thank you so much Boux!

Lucie Bra in 'Strawberry': http://www.bouxavenue.com/bras/lucie-lace-triangle-bra/100997_40ST28A.html

Tara-Jade

x

London's newest Insta cocktail bars - Bar Elba and Tonight Josephine

Bar number One: Bar Elba

I wanted to pop a quick blog post up, a bit similar to my last one admittedly, but being a London student I love finding cute new bars for that dreaded moment when friends come up to visit and say "take us to somewhere COOL, you know like a rooftop bar or something really LONDON" and all you can think of is the pub down the road from uni that you drag yourself to after an all nighter deadline to celebrate making it through the night. So when my beautiful cousins suggested a girly meet up day, I actually did my research this time and found out about Bar Elba which was just around the corner from Waterloo, perfect for drinks after a stroll down Southbank. 

We rocked up at around 5pm which unknown to us was the start of happy hour, which came as a very happy little surprise but quite a dangerous one aha! We were also one of the first to turn up so managed to bag ourselves the 'Instagram wall' before everyone came flooding in. The bar itself spanned the whole way around the roof so had so much space and a 360 view of the city, much bigger than it looked on all the photos. I also loved the relaxed and tropical vibe that they had going, it was really fun without feeling expensive or snooty as some of the themed bars sometimes do. We came along for day time drinking which was lovely in the evening sunshine but it would have been equally as cute with a group for an evening visit with the bench style tables and fairy lights, will definitely be making a return trip!

As we were leaving we heard one of the bar men mention about Tonight Josephine which was the bar that we had originally wanted to go to, and explain that it was actually Bar Elba's sister bar just downstairs, with a fun little backstory about Napoleon and Wife Josephine, with Bar Elba being Napoleon's bar and downstairs being Josephine's. As it was still quite early in the evening the lovely hosts managed to squeeze us into an unbooked slot for downstairs so our day drinking  

Bar number Two: Tonight Josephine

Turns out Tonight Josephine is Bar Elba's much sassier, girl power themed sister, and it was fab. Admittedly a lot smaller than the last bar but they packed a lot into this little underground bar, and even more neon! If Missguided was a bar, this is what it would look like, head to toe pink, holographic walls, flower hanging ceilings, girl power plastered over the toilet walls, along with Lindsay Lohan and Justin Bieber's mugshots. Iconic. I would say that the highlight was the Parma Violet flavoured cocktail which tasted exactly like it, we loved it so much that the bar man ended up giving us Parma Violets with every cocktail we ordered, amazing! 

In short, if you are looking for a girly, pink themed bar with plenty of photo opportunities, both of these are perfect, although I would suggest booking ahead especially for Tonight Josephine, as I am sure it will get very busy once these neon signs start spreading across The Gram! OH and happy hour is between 5-7pm, thank me later!

Dress: Missguided

 https://www.missguided.co.uk/silky-wrap-dress-cobalt-blue

Tara-Jade x

Easter Bank Holiday Weekend - The Ivy Chelsea Garden

I haven't been the most active on my blog, I'll be the first to admit, but as a had a little bit of spare time on my hands and had so many nice photos from what I got up to over the Easter Bank Holiday weekend, I thought I would share them all on here instead of thousands of Instagram posts!

 After seeing photos of The Ivy Chelsea Garden's INSANE flower wall plastered all over the internet, we decided to take a trip up there ourselves, and it did not disappoint! With it being such a gorgeous sunny evening we found ourselves a spot down the bottom of the courtyard on some little sofas with blankets included, all underneath beautiful white blossom trees and with marble tables. We couldn't really have found a more instagram-able spot if we tried! I highly recommend a trip up there, even if it is just a nice backdrop for any bloggers out there, but I will warn you that you will have to fight your way through everyone else trying to get their flower wall photoshoots at the same time aha!

I mean if I'm being completely honest with you, after taking all these pretty photos with our fancy expensive drinks, we all went back to mine and got white girl wasted on a cheap bottle of Pinot before heading out to Soho, but who is to judge on the Bank Holiday right?!

Happy Easter loves,

Tara- Jade x 

KYLIE WHO?

If like me you have indulged FAR too heavily this Christmas, this brand new Tusk Boutique 'Emerald waist corset' is the perfect addition to your outfit to give you your waist back! Taking inspiration from King Kylie herself, this outfit also gives you the perfect excuse to pull off an oversized t-shirt as a going out outfit if you have had just about enough of sparkly Christmas dresses. I teamed mine with a pair of Ego 'Anushka' booties to give an extra Yeezy touch to the whole outfit. 

All Tusk Boutique items are unique, crafted by hand and custom fitted to your own individual measurements, which gives it this amazing fit. This gorgeous oriental satin fabric is so on trend at the moment, and combined with the lace up waist corset style, I'm in love! Find them below ladies:

Instagram: @tuskboutique

Depop: @tuskboutique

Any custom orders or enquires: tuskboutique@outlook.com

Boots: Ego shoes

http://ego.co.uk/anushka-knit-ankle-boot-with-wooden-heel-in-nude.html

(Currently on sale girls, so quick!)

Enjoy!

Tara-Jade x